Heat Wave

Well, first it was the shock of being back at work, now it is the heat wave. Trying not to whinge too much, and indeed keeping busy, when energy allows, actually is a good thing, it takes your mind off it.

What's a very unfortunate consequence of the heat is the damage to the garden. Yesterday, the day we actually broke the heat records, I decided to just let some of the plants die. On water restrictions, and with only using recycled water, how can you water a fairly large garden?

I am trying to save certain plants, such as the natives I put in during Autumn, but lots are dead and many are close to it. The 3 large tomatoe bushes, which I have been carefully looking after are on the sacrifice list, what a waste. And many salvias, beautiful purple and bright blue ones, will be dead by today or tomorrow. So much for dry tolerant plants, even they cannot survive the frying. A few of the camelias have browned leaves, but they should make it, the susceptible ones already died off last year. And as a facing the fact of global warminig and temperature change, I have decided also to stop trying to keep the treee ferns alive. That is very sad, as there are about 6 large ones, and I think some of them have been here about 20 years (since the house was built). They will have to be pulled out in autumn/winter. and replaced with maybe some smaller growing ferns or tougher plants. Living in a shady garden is no longer enough if the temperature rises to high. The 2 large daphne bushes are almost dead, but thankfully I saw this coming last year, hence the obsession with planting a range of Correas! They, and Grevilleas, once they get going, love it around here. They can cope with the poor soil and the semi shade.

The front yard is a waste land, but that started in winter when it became obvious I did not have the energy or muscle power to look after both the front and back yards. So, despite the fact that is the part that not many people see, I have been focusing on the back yard. It is where I "hang out", so that is more important to me than appearances.

Maybe I will have to rethink even more this year about what to remove. Noticing what has survived, even without watering has been interesting. A Desert pea from WA looks as if it is business as usual, obviously need to plant some more of those. Also the Cherry Pies (Heliotrope), whilst looking sad, have had no deaths so far, and I have lots of them around.

An opportunity to visit nurseries to get some more natives in Autumn, makes the whole dying garden thing no quite so depressing. Birth, growth, death, all in the cycle that is life. The veggie patch is going to be cut in half. Replaced by, it was going to be more herbs, but now natives. This year I have discovered that keeping lettuces and herbs in pots, so you can put them in the shade, can provide quite enough for the kitchen. (I swore off pots last year ironically enough....the cycle of opinion as well!)

Here's to cooler days, and just a little more rain.....

Procrastination

Procrastination would have to be one of my biggest problems in many areas of my life. I am a triple certified procrastinator, in work life, home life, and really any area that is not directly related to eating or sleeping. From Maslow's hierachy I suppose that would make me sitting comfy half way up the pyramid, and looking up at the rest of the pyramid looming above, thinking "oh, yes, I really must do that soon". Very minimal movement in any direction until dire consequences start threatening, and woops, see how fast I really can really move!
Take this blogging business for instance, here I am typing away at the computer whilst I have a significant piece of work I have to do at home today. Start small was my new motto recently, just take one small step at a time, and soon you will find you are well underway. Great advice from self help books. Problem is, I am not a small step kinda gal. It's all or nothing with me, jump right in that pool, or complete disdain at the thought of getting a toe wet. Passionate, is what I would like to call it, but really a full on case of black or white thinking. And that's where the procrastination comes in. It's do it all, right now, climb that mountain, don't stop. Or don't even start. There's the rub.

"Only put off tomorrow what you are willing to die having left undone"
Pablo Picassso

I found this quote this morning about procrastination, it's one that's hopefully going to shake me out of my procrastination fog (I love a mixed metaphor). Now, to begin.....

Values and perhaps Internet dating?

Today at work I was planning a lesson and some group work about stress management for students. I remember hearing or reading somewhere, perhaps at a workshop, that the further away from our values our life is, the more stressful it is. It got me thinking. Not just about how to approach the topic with young people for work, but also about values in general.

I have thought about my own values a bit lately. But what about the values of other people we interact with? If they have similar values does it mean they are likely to remain friends, or become friends over time, or is more circumstance and matching of personalities? What about workplaces and work colleagues who have different values, is that job or employment doomed. You are next in line for retrenchment because you value different things to your manager? There are always work mission statements and values, but what about the Real Ones, you know, what actually happens? We live closely with mates/spouses or partners, (or, you would hope so!), so, if they have very different values to ours its a doomed relationship? In that case even some of my friends and I would have to part!

At work we were talking, (yes, we were doing some work as well....), and it appears that finding a mate by Internet dating is certainly more popular than I thought it was. Ticking boxes about likes, dislikes, and values is perhaps a great way to get to the real core of the compatibility issue. Providing people don't lie much more than they would in person, (which is quite a lot in real life I am led to believe). Does the same concept about a mate/spouse's values apply to us? That is, if they have different values, is it simply one big stressful life waiting to unfold? Or are the other factors in relationship more or just as important, such as personality. Myself, I like the idea of a short cut, not just for finding a partner, but also for perhaps giving to friends and people you meet. Hey you, just fill in this questionnaire would you......

Skype and more

Wow, what a great way to communicate. First time user today with the webcam. It's amazing how much better communication is when you can see the other person. I had used the phone only part of skype before, which was just like a phonecall, but this is different. The issue is, you can see the other person, but occassionally both you and they momentarily forget they are on camera....the odd scratching, wiggling in the seat, pulling faces, that perhaps we wouldn't use in person. Its a funny thing to think about, how we "act" in the presence of another person, whether consciously or subconsciously.

Pulling me back into the presence was the video of me, right there in the corner......rubbing the hayfever nose, moving forward and back, grinning like a Chesire cat, God, do I do that all the time? Or is it my "bymyself" act? Perhaps a bit more self awareness practice is needed.

Letting your guard down with friends can be a bit of a shock when it is beamed back at you in full colour. A bit like the mirror in the clothes shop change rooms. I like to think how I look, (or more truthfully, avoid thinking about how I look), and seeing what others see is a shock. Is what I feel from the inside more helpful, or less destructive than seeing from the outside, even if the outside is more accurate?

I suppose trying to combine observed external facts with the internal observed self is what things like feldenkrais and ACT therapy are about. One is based around the physical self, the other the mental self, but both have surprising crossover effects. If you don't know what feldenkrais is, I suppose it is about body awareness and learning about what we do, and what also can be possible. ACT is about mind and values awareness, what we do, and what we can do to act more in accordance with our values. I personally have found these two practices to complement each other very well. But practice being the essential word.....

So, here's to some more reality and less avoidance; through practice, and some more practice.
Though perhaps with the camera moved just that little further away......

Starting the New Year with technology

Blogging. Well, who'ld have thunk it? Too paranoid as a teenager to ever write anything in my diary that was really interesting, for fear of someone reading it, now this. A diary, slash, rant, slash, self obsessed conversation for everyone on the internet to see. Well, I say again, who'ld have thunk it!
The idea will be to try and to keep to one topic each blog. Difficult for me as I tend to go off on multiple tangents, but that's the aim anyway. Quite exciting really. A year of coming of age. The technological age that is. We'll see how it goes...............................